So this picture symbolizes our marriage pretty accurately at the moment. This is how we wake up together, this is how we tell each other to have a nice day, this is how we snuggle at night. There is no glamour in a long distance relationship.
There are many times where video gchats are completely fulfilling. When I wake up in the morning and I talk to Jillian it always makes the day go better. But it’s when we try to have a serious conversation that this form of communication shows its cracks and flaws. It’s hard to connect emotionally when you speak to a computer. Sometimes just a smile can make me melt away, but then other times we could try so hard and just never see eye-to-eye.
Granted, it’s better than nothing. About 5 years ago this wouldn’t even be possible to do on a regular basis, so the fact that we can do it at all makes us extremely lucky. I personally think I would be a basketcase without it. But for some reason it connects us just enough to bear it, but not enough to bridge to gap fully.
It’s obvious that nothing can replace being together, which almost makes the tease of a video chat even worse. It’s almost like it’s taunting you: “There she is, just reach out and hug her. Come on, she’s right there. Ohhh, sorry, you just smudged your computer screen again.” I swear I think it will work one of these days.